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16 October 2007 @ 11:23 pm
The Kissing Disease  
*Sits in wingback chair in a smoking jacket, pipe on a table next to him, martini in hand, as fruity classical music plays*

Good evening, ladies and...well, for this post, probably just the ladies. Welcome to a moment I like to call:

Mastersquee Theatre

Tonight we will dissect the Kisses of Doctor Who: What, If Anything, Do They Mean? This is analyzed in light of the recent spoilers for the new Christmas special. I allude to them, so be forewarned, but if you want to see what they are, exactly, check my flist. It's a veritable bonanza of squee. Spoilers abound!

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Exhibit A: Nine and Rose/Bad Wolf
Episode: The Parting of the Ways
The Squee: Aside from it being the Doctor and Rose (or mostly Rose, partially the Heart of the TARDIS), perhaps it was the lead-up, the only time in history that a pun has ever inspired an "awww" reaction:
Bad Wolf Rose: I can see everything. All that is, all that was...
*Doctor is watching her, look on his face one that of shock and amazement as he realizes what she's describing sounds familiar...*
Rose: ...all that ever could be...
Doctor: *On his feet, still staring at her in awe* That's what I see! All the time! *Slow smile spreading on his face* But doesn't it drive you mad?
Rose: My head...
Doctor: Come here.
Rose: It's killing me...
Doctor: *Gentle smile* I think you need a doctor. *Looks at her for a moment, before leaning down to kiss her.*
The Sanity: There is nothing but pure squee here. You can make all the excuses you want that it was all about getting the time vortex back out of Rose, but the build-up, the feeling of having someone who understands, and the Doctor's ultimate sacrifice for Rose? That's all for us, baby.

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Exhibit B: Ten and Cassandra (Possessing Rose)
Episode: New Earth
The Squee: It's really, really hot to see anyone Rose shaped snog the Doctor, even if you know, intellectually, it isn't her. Also, the fact that the Doctor didn't seem nearly as shocked as you'd imagine he'd be if Rose snogged him out of the blue in a public place, which may imply this isn't as random an event for him as one would imagine...
The Sanity: Alas, it really wasn't Rose kissing the Doctor, although icon makers have no trouble disregarding this. The implications of it are nice, but there's something skeevy about Cassandra using Rose's body to mack on her man.

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Exhibit C: Ten and Reinette/Madame de Pompadour
Episode: The Girl in the Fireplace
The Squee: Very little. Shippers rationalize it that she kissed him, that he was more fangirling than genuinely in love, or are just glad that whatever they had was blissfully short lived.
The Sanity: The writer, Steve Moffat, described the episode as a love story, so we got to face facts that it was real, like it or not.

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Exhibit D: Ten and Rose
Episode: The Impossible Planet
The Squee: Already an arc where the Doctor and Rose seem at their closest, when the Doctor is going down to the surface of the planet perched precariously at the edge of a black hole, Rose wishes him luck by kissing his be-helmeted forehead, at once a casual move and a significant one.
The Sanity: There was a realistic chance that he would die. There was an equally realistic chance that they would be stuck here together forever. Sobering stuff, but not enough to kill the squee.

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Exhibit E: Ten and Martha
Episode: Smith and Jones
The Squee: Shifting gears into a Doctor/Martha mode (not my ship, but bear with me), pretty much the first thing the Doctor did when he met Martha was snog her. Not many companions can say that.
The Sanity: It was a genetic transfer, so that he could fool the Judoon, and, later, save his own life.

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(Image Note: for S3 images I went to the BBC, because I don't have S3. The image below this one is also from the Beeb, since I was already there and didn't want to load the ep. Anyway, they didn't have a pic of the kisses, so I went with a couply one.)
Exhibit F: John Smith and Joan Redfern
Episode: Human Nature and Family of Blood
The Squee: Joan really did sort of rock, and you had to feel for the woman and her doomed love for the human alter ego of the Doctor. If just because as Doctor/Rose shippers, we have a thing for doomed romance.
The Sanity: As I said, it was not really Ten, but his human alter ego, a tragic normal man cursed to turn back into a lonely and frightening alien, and to lose his love.

Exhibit G: Ten and Astrid
Episode: Voyage of the Damned
The Squee: The song, which, as I said, take a look at my flist if you really want to know. Snog or not, that's a "kiss off" song.
The Sanity: Honestly, we don't know yet, but we're pretty sure it'll be there.

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Episode: Doomsday
The Squee: Not a kiss, but ROSE SAID SHE LOVED HIM, and we're about 99.8% sure he was about to say it back. I repeat: SHE SAID IT.
The Sanity: Seen Doomsday lately? Not really conductive to sanity, I tell you what. Okay, I'll say it: it was the end. BUT SHE SAID IT. Can't take that from us.

Conclusion: Kisses from Ten, at least, seem to be a dime a dozen. He hands them out like candy. The one person he didn't properly snog on camera is the one person that we have proof that he loved. Therefore, a kiss from Ten is like a greeting card: nice to get, but ultimately not worth much.
Current Mood: giddyshippy
Larissalarissa_j on October 17th, 2007 04:32 am (UTC)
Yep, you already know my opinion on this and on GitF.

Onscreen kisses from Ten mean nothing.

Still, I wonder if there is something else... something either offscreen or some other thing from him that means more? (besides the almost ILY)
A Guy Named Gooaguynamedgoo on October 17th, 2007 09:57 am (UTC)
If I had to guess, from the Cassandra!snog on New Earth, there was probably some coupliness offscreen. If that was as random as it seemed, Ten probably would have had more of a reaction than a wide-eyed stare, then a smug "I've still got it". Perhaps he just likes his affection to be a private thing, and PDAs aren't his thing. Not when there's so much to explore, anyway. Besides, hold hands, you get to have a PDA and explore!
chaoticsetchaoticset on October 17th, 2007 04:47 am (UTC)
I like to think there is an inherent value in a kiss, no matter whether it's a real distinction or not. :P
chaoticsetchaoticset on October 17th, 2007 05:00 am (UTC)
Oh, and -- do you actually drink martinis?
A Guy Named Gooaguynamedgoo on October 17th, 2007 05:24 am (UTC)
Nah. Well, honestly, never tried one. I usually hammer down screwdrivers.
chaoticsetchaoticset on October 17th, 2007 05:34 am (UTC)
Oh, ho. You're punny. :P
bean_bunnybean_bunny on October 17th, 2007 09:08 am (UTC)
This show is on Sci-Fi, right? When? You've convinced me that I need to see it at least once.
A Guy Named Gooaguynamedgoo on October 17th, 2007 09:13 am (UTC)
The bad news is they just finished the latest season on Sci-Fi and they haven't put reruns on the schedule yet (I think CBC might have, but I seem to be the only American who gets CBC).

Good news is you can stream it here.
bean_bunnybean_bunny on October 17th, 2007 09:21 am (UTC)
Wow! That's a pretty neat site, I wonder if therTHEYHAVESTARTREKZOMG.

'Scuse me, I have to love you forever.
A Guy Named Goo: Kit Young Man by iamsimplysaraaguynamedgoo on October 17th, 2007 09:29 am (UTC)
Some of that love goes to keristars, who turned me onto that site (specifically for Doctor Who, in fact, although she hasn't seen it herself). I send her lots of love every day for it.
DIANE FUCKING HOLMESvolitaire on October 17th, 2007 03:06 pm (UTC)
This was amazing/so true.
"Mastersquee". LMFAO.
Reereetinkerbell on October 18th, 2007 10:18 pm (UTC)
*by way of the_spdn*

The only one that really mattered for the Doctor was the first one anyway, and that was with Rose. :P And, of course, the "D" kiss one too. I love how his eyes are closed.

Thanks for this.
Pervy Nine Fancier: jacksmile--gemstar69honorh on October 19th, 2007 12:21 am (UTC)
Hey! What about Jack? What happened to his kissing of Nine and Rose? If you're going to put in Reinette and Martha, we should have Jack.
A Guy Named Gooaguynamedgoo on October 19th, 2007 12:25 am (UTC)
My bad! I'll fix it in a little while. Honestly, I just forogt.
A Guy Named Gooaguynamedgoo on October 19th, 2007 05:03 am (UTC)
Okay, quick, which ep was that? I'm very tired, but I'll add it tomorrow.
Mari: DW Mr and Mrs Whofaeryaeryn on October 23rd, 2007 06:06 am (UTC)
Great post!
My favorite kiss is the one in The Partying of the Ways, so awwwwww and romantic in my opinion :-)
Also love Rose kissing helmeted Ten, very cute.
Cassandra kissing the Doctor.....I see it as Rose making Cassandra kiss the Doctor....so for me it is really Rose doing the kissing :-)

Hate anything in the Girl in the Fireplace, in fact I do not understand that episode, why make him love the girl when he is in love with Rose??!! grrrrrr

The Doctor kissing Martha is of no importance to me, he kisses everybody, LOL