For this to work, you have to use the pronunciation of "Celestial" with three syllables instead of four (Sell-EST-yal, instead of Sell-EST-ee-all). Also, 00 = "Double-Oh". I was constantly stymied by the long-ass character and place names, BTW. And yes, I sort of take some liberties with what constitutes a "haiku", pretty much only following the 5-7-5 rule. That's how I roll. If I failed in that, DEAL WITH IT! I mean, tell mean and I'll see if I can fix it.
Needless to say, spoilers abound. Although none of these make any goddamn sense unless you've seen G00.
Season One
Episode 1
Celestial Being
Appears in kickass Gundams
Ruins Patrick's day
Episode 2
Everyone wonders
What's with Celestial Being?
Early eps are boring
Episode 3
Setsuna beats Graham
Celestial Being attacks
More of the same stuff
Episode 4
Marina useless
Shirin and Soma are hot
Hooray for boobies!
Episode 5
Day in the spotlight
For Allelujah this time
Don't get used to it
Episode 6
More Marina crap
Fucking Ali introduced
Setsuna's stupid
Episode 7
Setsuna's stupid
I know I said that last time
It bears repeating
Episode 8
More stupidity
Setsuna and Marina
Should not ever breed
Episode 9
Nadleeh is revealed
Tieria not happy
Lyle's in the intro
Episode 10
Allelujah caught
He seems really good at that
Halle chokes a bitch
Episode 11
More Alle spotlight
Like he's actually a
Real main character
Episode 12
Azadistan sucks
But just look at their ruler
It only makes sense
Episode 13
There is someone else
Setsuna faces Ali
Rescues the hostage
Episode 14
The trap has been set
Celestial Being still go
Finally! Drama!
Episode 15
Looks bad for Meisters
They're getting their asses kicked
Help from new Gundams
Episode 16
Trinities revealed
They're the crazy new pilots
But it's a clip show
Episode 17
Trinities seem off
Meisters don't want to trust them
I blame all the red
Episode 18
Nena is a bitch
Randomly plays up wedding
Louise is broken
Episode 19
Battle against Thrones
Veda hacked, which is not good
Past secrets revealed
Episode 20
Ribbons finds Veda
Wang Liu-Mei a two-faced bitch
Thrones up to no good
Episode 21
Veda is taken
Tieria freezes up
Lockon loses eye
Episode 22
Begin final arc
Alejandro gives Meisters
The edge they needed
Episode 23
Lockon won't stay put
Insists on getting revenge
Only dies trying
Episode 24
The show must go on
Even with Lockon gone now
Time for final fight
Episode 25
Lots of stuff happens
Not conductive to haiku
Good guys win, okay?
Season 2
Episode 1
It's the grand return
Celestial Being is back
So much promise here!
Episode 2
Lyle is recruited
We need Lockon sexiness
And FUCKING RIBBONS
Episode 3
Save Allelujah!
And then we can forget him
But hey, I warned you
Episode 4
Marina is back
Can't just let her die, can we?
That'd be too easy
Episode 5
Saji's big screw-up
Tieria smacks him good
A-LAWS push forward
Episode 6
Fucking Ali lived!
Louise has gone crazycakes
Mr. Grahamshido
Episode 7
Alle centric ep
This is the last one ever
It's also boring
Episode 8
Tieria's twin
Tells him of his true nature
Gets him in a dress
Episode 9
Fight against Ali
Still pissed about Lockon's death
The A-LAWS attack
Episode 10
New Gundam toys shown
Lyle meets Anew, hits it off
Katharon hit bad
Episode 11
Memento Mori
Is the Meister's new target
Using new Gundams
Episode 12
00 Riser
Is Sparkly Jesus Gundam
Ribbons wants it bad
Episode 13
More Innovators
Memento Mori goes down
When Lyle does trench run
Episode 14
Lyle is still a spy
Although everyone knows
Coup d'etat in works
Episode 15
Setsuna injured
Dreams of Neil, finds Marina
Coup d'etat force moves
Episode 16
A-LAWS kill people
That are being held hostage
Yeah, they are not nice
Episode 17
Elevator shot
Second Memento Mori
Sergei killed by son
Episode 18
A four month time skip
Anew is Innovator
Search for Veda starts
Episode 19
Regene traitor
Anew snaps; attacks CB
Liu-Mei gets shot down
Episode 20
Anew still crazy
Tries to steal the 00
Gets killed; Lyle breaks down
Episode 21
Liu-Mei still alive
Turns down help but she offers
Veda coordinates
Episode 22
Another Graham fight
Regene shoots Ribbons, yay!
Kati now good guy
Episode 23
Ribbons still alive
Kills Regene, only to
Face Tieria
Episode 24
Tieria dead
Or is he? Regene has
One last trick in store
Episode 25
Veda recaptured
Setsuna defeats Ribbons
And Lyle killed Ali